HERE IN MY ROOM

HERE IN MY ROOM

I've always tried to do what's right and do the things I should.

But here I stay in this cage with no bars and a life sentence that's just understood.

So here I sit where there are only darkness and gloom.

There is no light, only pain and despair . . . here in my room.

I thought I had done right but I guess I was wrong.

So I stay in this place where there is nothing, where I belong.

There seems to be a force that hungers for souls to consume.

So I stay lost without hope and without love . . . here in my room.

I know for everything there is a reason and for every reason there is a rhyme.

I can't help but wonder what my reason is and when is my time.

Nothing gets better and down the road I can see more things starting to loom.

The glass is not half empty, the glass is not half full; everything is empty . . . here in my room.

There are only feelings of sadness and sorrow and things that make me cry.

I search through this deep, thick, darkness, but without light, I will never understand why.

This place is filled with evil, and when things start to look good the evil will always resume.

There is nothing good to do, nothing good to say, no happy thoughts . . . here in my room.

If there could be a birth that could save me from this blight.

If only I could live in the day and not just in the night.

It's small and tight closing in from all sides like a womb.

Everything is there I don't need to think, I don't need to care . . . here in my room.

Lying in a bed of sadness covered in remorse,

I'm trying to navigate through all this nothingness and get back on course.

There is nothing to want in this lifeless cocoon there is nothing but death in this dusty old tomb.

There is nothing to hear, no music, no whispers, no sounds . . . here in my room.

I have to look left just to see what's on the right.

I look deep into the darkness in hopes of finding a speck of light.

Spinning and spinning faster and faster toward impending doom.

Churning and churning there is a web of deceit that lurks . . . here in my room.

There's nothing coming in and nothing going out,

Because here in the dark that's what it's all about.

Every day I pray, I know it's a lot to ask, and I know it's a lot to assume.

Maybe someday the right person will come along and let some light in . . . here in my room.

STANLEY HENDRIX

6/21/09

My book of poems "DEEP DARK SECRETS" is available online at WWW.PUBLISHAMERICA.COM, WWW.BOOKSAMILLION.COM, WWW.BARNESANDNOBLE.COM, WWW.AMAZON.COM,and WWW.BORDERS.COM

DAD

DAD

Many years ago I started this journey all alone,

Then you were there for me to make me a home.

There was so much to learn and so little time.

I had questions that were silly, good, dumb and deep, but they were all mine.

Then things started going wrong, things got a little crazy.

For me those days were a long time ago and a little hazy.

Even though there was love and there was affection,

Our journey moved on and we went in different directions.

The journey continued and I saw lots of new places.

I kept asking silly questions and learned from many new faces.

There were times that we struggled and when it was as bad as it could be.

I always knew that there was someone to save me, that you would be back for me.

In playing the game of life, I ran hard, I ran fast, until I was out of breath.

There were times early on that I flirted with death.

Once death flirted back and my journey was almost through.

Through the things that went bad and the pain of life, I was still waiting for you.

Some time had passed and I couldn't help but wonder if I would ever see you again.

Then it happened, you had come to get me, I was nine, almost ten.

Things were different this time; you had new kids and a new wife.

I tried, but I didn't seem wanted by the new family and didn't fit in the new life.

Before long the summer had passed and it was time to say goodbye.

I talked, you talked and we both would cry.

You brought me to the airport and for the first time I would fly.

I didn't know it at the time, but before I would see you again, fifteen years would go by.

I grew up knowing you were out there, somewhere; I knew you had to still be alive.

By the time you found me again, I had started a family of my own, I was twenty-five.

We saw each other off and on through my first wife and the second one.

But I lived here and you lived there so we saw each other on the run.

I don't know what happened, but somehow we lost communication again.

Time flew by and the next time we would see each other the years that had passed were ten.

During this journey, we really haven’t spent much time together and that makes me sad.

I will cherish the time we did have together and I will always love you, you’re my dad.

STANLEY HENDRIX

06/02/09

My book of poems "DEEP DARK SECRETS" is available online at WWW.PUBLISHAMERICA.COM, WWW.BOOKSAMILLION.COM, WWW.BARNESANDNOBLE.COM, WWW.AMAZON.COM,and WWW.BORDERS.COM